I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
