Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Randomize
