I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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