I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
