Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
