YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
