Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
