I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
My ass is underappreciated
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize