You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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