Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!

  (1-313): View more from Michigan

  "omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"

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  (313): Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!! (1-313): "omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore" http://tfl.nu/6kn3
  Replies (20) Good night (819) Bad night (1559)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here

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  (804): Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here http://tfl.nu/obgo
  Replies (3) Good night (1016) Bad night (628)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....

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  (503): Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby.... http://tfl.nu/qo4n
  Replies (11) Good night (3073) Bad night (573)
• Favorite

  (563): View more from Iowa

  How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?

  (1-563): View more from Iowa

  The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?

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  (563): How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence? (1-563): The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them? http://tfl.nu/0g65
  Replies (46) Good night (2903) Bad night (1282)
• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.

  (818): View more from California

  First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.

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  (323): may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in. (818): First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats. http://tfl.nu/s5xw
  Replies (41) Good night (7893) Bad night (839)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.

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  (678): i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste. http://tfl.nu/3anp
  Replies (21) Good night (4997) Bad night (1947)
• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.

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  (901): we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly. http://tfl.nu/dwqa
  Replies (58) Good night (1814) Bad night (14818)
• Favorite

  (239): View more from Florida

  they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out

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  (239): they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out http://tfl.nu/ncls
  Replies (2) Good night (3781) Bad night (880)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.

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  (586): I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver. http://tfl.nu/zb2m
  Replies (1) Good night (2150) Bad night (883)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.

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  (407): you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations. http://tfl.nu/xedp
  Replies (15) Good night (2575) Bad night (1220)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.

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  (303): Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass. http://tfl.nu/tyko
  Replies (5) Good night (799) Bad night (666)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix

  (760): View more from California

  THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE

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  (760): We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix (760): THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE http://tfl.nu/hk7r
  Replies (5) Good night (1617) Bad night (527)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.

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  (513): Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C. http://tfl.nu/3wtt
  Replies (4) Good night (1067) Bad night (743)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.

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  (615): Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud. http://tfl.nu/i1my
  Replies (7) Good night (996) Bad night (607)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..

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  (+44): I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far.. http://tfl.nu/4lu0
  Replies (2) Good night (380) Bad night (550)

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