Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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