apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
