ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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