Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
