Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I love you. Go after that dick
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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