she looked like the before picture.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Randomize
