your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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