I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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