I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
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