He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Randomize
