Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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