wat bout pragnant strippers??
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
i out mim tonsoeep
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