im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
