I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
I'm really busy with my period
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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