on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
