I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I don't deserve a penis
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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