Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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