I'm really into asian looking animals
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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