1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Randomize
