My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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