That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I need to calm my uterus...
Randomize
