So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
