can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
