I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
