help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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