This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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