No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
