He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
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