This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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