i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
