omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
