I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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