8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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