Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
