I'm pants shitting drunk right now
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
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