the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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