someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
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