you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
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