I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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