But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Randomize
