laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
then he tried to convert me to islam
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Randomize