How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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